Oct 18, 2025
Let me ask you something. When you get on a horse, what do you really see?
Is it just an animal? A big pet? A machine built to carry you around?
Or do you see something deeper? Something complex, intelligent, and alive with emotion?
Because if you don’t understand what a horse truly is, biologically, psychologically, socially, you’re not riding. You’re just riding on him.
And that’s dangerous. Not just for the horse. For you too.
I’ve seen riders beat horses in the face, slap them across the muzzle, yank reins like they’re trying to break a stubborn door. I’ve watched people kick, pull, and punish their horses for something as simple as not moving fast enough. And the worst part? They don’t even realize what they’re doing. They think they’re “training.” They think they’re “disciplining.” But they’re not. They’re destroying trust.
So let’s cut through the noise.
Let’s talk about what a horse really is.
Because your horse isn’t a robot. He’s not a tool. He’s not a piece of property.
He’s a living, breathing, feeling being, capable of joy, fear, grief, and deep connection.
If you don’t understand this, you’ll never build a real relationship. You’ll only create fear, resistance, and pain.
And when a horse breaks down emotionally or physically, you’ll blame him. “He’s bad.” “He’s lazy.” “He’s not trainable.”
But the truth? The error is always on the saddle.
Let’s start with facts.
Horses are not solitary creatures. They thrive in groups. They form deep bonds, comfort each other, and even mourn their companions.
"A horse alone is not a whole horse." – Ancient saying
This isn’t just folklore. Studies show that isolated horses exhibit higher stress levels, reduced immune function, and behavioral issues like weaving, cribbing, and aggression.
Yet so many owners keep their horses alone in stalls, “for safety,” “for convenience,” “because they’re easier to manage.” That’s not care. That’s neglect.
He was born to run. To leap. To push limits.
His body is built for endurance, power, and grace. His heart rate can reach 240 beats per minute during intense exercise. His muscles are designed for sustained effort, not short bursts.
Yet we see riders who ride for 15 minutes and call it “a good session.” Or worse, they ride their horses at high speeds without proper warm-up, leading to injury.
Horses don’t need to be “toughened up.” They need to be understood.
History remembers them as soldiers. Knights rode them into battle, charging through fire and fear. They stood firm when men faltered.
Abraham Lincoln once said: “I can make a general in five minutes, but a good horse is hard to replace.”
That’s not hyperbole. It’s respect.
And yet today, some riders treat horses like toys, riding them only when they feel like it, ignoring their physical and mental needs.
He reads tone, touch, and tension. He remembers kindness, and betrayal.
Studies show horses can recognize human emotions from facial expressions and vocal tones. They respond to anger, anxiety, and fear with increased heart rate and defensive behaviors.
"A horse doesn’t care how much you know until he knows how much you care." – John Shedd
That’s not poetry. That’s neuroscience.
Here are the myths I’ve seen destroy relationships:
“Horses are just like dogs and cats.”
No. They’re not. They’re herd animals with complex social hierarchies. They don’t “obey” like a dog. They choose to follow.
“All you need to ride well is to learn how to sit properly.”
No. Sitting is just the beginning. Riding is about communication, timing, and presence.
“Horses were created to serve us.”
No. They evolved to survive. They weren’t made for our convenience. They’re partners, not servants.
“My horse is fine, he eats and drinks.”
Eating isn’t the same as thriving. A horse needs movement, social contact, and mental stimulation.
“He’s not bad, he’s just stubborn.”
Stubbornness isn’t a trait. It’s a symptom. Of fear. Of confusion. Of poor training.
Ask yourself:
If not, the problem isn’t the horse. It’s the handler.
Based on what I’ve learned, from pain, from failure, from watching others suffer, here’s what you must do:
Learn the Basics of Equine Psychology
Read books. Watch science-based videos. Understand how horses think, feel, and react.
Never Ride Without Purpose
Every session should have a goal: balance, focus, transition, connection. No purpose = wasted time.
Build Trust First
Spend time grooming. Walking. Just sitting. Let your horse know you’re safe. You’re honest. You’re present.
Check Your Body Language
Are you tense? Anxious? Your horse feels it. Calm your breath. Relax your hands.
Avoid Force-Based Training
Use positive reinforcement. Reward good behavior. Never punish for fear or confusion.
Respect the Horse’s Rhythm
He lives by pattern. Change unsettles him. Predictability gives him peace.
Always Double-Check Information
Don’t believe everything you hear at the barn. Learn from trusted sources. Ask questions. Read books.
To ride a horse is not a right. It’s a privilege. One earned through patience, consistency, and humility.
And if you want to understand what this really means, if you want to learn how to ride with integrity, purpose, and compassion, then you need to read The Promise.
This book isn’t just about horsemanship. It’s about healing. About fatherhood. About responsibility.
It’s about seeing the horse not as a machine, but as a mirror of your own soul.
Because when we stop seeing horses as tools and start seeing them as equals, we don’t just become better riders, we become better humans.
And that’s the promise I made. To Kuzey. To my son. To myself.
Now, it’s yours to keep.