SprinklerBandits

It's kind of hard to write a lot when my only goals with my horse are "have fun every day" and "enjoy what a special lady she is" because I guess it just sounds like bragging? And sort of a weird overshare where it's like "I've legitimately never had a bad ride on this horse/she always gives me 100%/she literally whinnies to me when I show up" where you're just like STFU already gross.  did i buy a stunning mohair breastcollar and matching headstall obviously yes It's great though, so there's that.  We are still working on things. The barn we're at has access into thousands of acres of public land and to get there, we have to ride past a couple pastures with horses in them (much snort! very gallop!) next to a road that isn't "busy" but does have large vehicles going fast periodically (and I'm terrified of traffic). We did it with a friend earlier this year and while zb is 100% unconcerned with traffic and only mildly interested in the gallop-y horses, it HIGHLIGHTED how I've just been passenger princess-ing around on my lovely horse and not really riding, if that makes sense. look how cute with her new bestie tho Like I never take charge bc we're just toodling around but then when I needed to provide some leadership, I was not prepared. The time to work through those things is not on a 15' wide strip of road next to a semi hitting the jake brake while your friends gallop and snort.  And also. As a seasoned adult ammy, my interest in just flooding both of us like that is near zero. Actually lower than zero. Hard pass. This year then, I've been attacking all of it in bite size pieces.  hi it's smokey here First: ZB lived at the same barn with the same friends for 6 years and then made a big move. She looked/acted FINE but let's be smart about stomach issues. Put her on a loading dose of Gut-X. looking good Second: my total inability to brain while traffic was 90% of the issue. I don't want or expect to be ok with traffic but I need to not completely melt down so I can provide my horse leadership. Spent the rest of the spring/early summer hand grazing next to the road and letting myself breathe and my heartrate slow while my horse continued to DGAF about anything but noms.  pardon the spring fuzzies Third: in order to provide leadership at critical moments, I need to build trust with my horse. She needs to know that I'm taking care of us and I need to know that her response isn't going to put us in harm's way. The thing with having a horse who's like ZB is that there's not a lot of reason to push these issues and then you're under stress like "oh damn there's a huge fucking training hole here that's completely my fault".  never gonna give this up That's what we've been attacking this year. And when I say attacking, I mean using the following principles: 1) I need to be a person my horse wants to hang out with. Not every day is a training day. Some days are feed my horse a treat days. All days clear headed. If I'm not in a place to provide calm, collected leadership, I DON'T. That means I don't ride or we toodle bareback or we just walk around and look at the sunset. I spend time grooming/hanging out and bonding and understand that is fully as important as time spent in the saddle for both of us.  we are always playing legos 2) Good boundaries start on the ground. I'm big on this regardless but from standing when I'm working on her to doing some basic yielding before I get on, it's important that we are aware of each other in space and I am providing direction.  also her first set of fly boots 3) I need to be actively engaged in decision making on board. That doesn't mean bullying my horse or mindlessly drilling but it does mean having a plan, providing direction, evaluating responses, and constantly staying in the moment with my horse.  i remembered i have a pivo the other day I've picked a big goal for us to work towards (flying changes, if you must know) (also solo trail riding), so I'm targeting those goals in a thoughtful, step by step manner. I'm not just going to be like LETS GO FLYING CHANGE but instead break it down: proof i own pants Goal: flying change Skill needed: balanced, forward canter on both leads Skill needed: prompt responses to cues under saddle Skill needed: ability to move zb's balance forward and back in motion in all gaits Skill needed: consistent, balanced transitions through and between all gaits. And so on.  did i mention sometimes it's so smokey we can't breathe and only walk The best part of the journey is enjoying every step. Which we do.  two cool kids... [Read more]

ZB and I moved barns at the beginning of December. I was trying to juggle a lot of travel commitments around winter weather, so I ended up moving her as a big winter storm was blowing in so I could be in town as she settled in vs out of state.  rolling Which is fine.  We moved to a really lovely little place that fits our needs and goals. We gave up the luxury of an indoor, which meant there would be limitations on winter riding.  Which again, is fine.  rolling I'm at a really cool place mentally where I can enjoy my horse every time I'm with her and there's no stress around what she should or shouldn't be doing or what anyone else is doing. I knew that winter/early spring riding was going to be weather dependent. I'm fine taking extra time doing stuff. I'm not riding 5 days a week and all is well.  All of that, fine.  she free jumped herself This spring has been weird though. I've felt a little out of balance and disconnected. Things aren't quite clicking and I'm second guessing myself. I added a gut supplement and did a lot of ground work and everything I did was telling me that my horse was fine but my confidence was absolutely shot for some reason.  That isn't fine.  um hello shiny I'm not about brute forcing things and I don't have a readily available trainer right now so I've just been kind of feeling it out. I needed a breakthrough.  So I saddled up on a nice spring day, put my foot in the stirrup, felt the smack of my boob hitting the saddle horn a split second before my feet hit the ground and found myself staring at my slightly confused horse from next to the mounting block.  Cough.  there are a lot of buckles in there This is a reminder to check your stirrup leather and make sure EVERYHING IS STILL ATTACHED before you try to get on.  More importantly though--I'd been feeling a little out of balance and like I wanted my stirrups shorter, but western stirrups are a PITA to mess with and I'm not riding that hard so I just hadn't and figured I'd get used to the length that had obviously been fine before.  And that meant I didn't change them.  everyone say hi to this adorable muppet Standing in the dusty arena seemed like a good time to address it, so I dutifully shortened that stirrup, then shortened and checked the other side. And then I got on.  I felt confident. Centered. In balance.  I pushed the reins forward and trusted my horse. I owned my own balance.  Since that day, I've been taking the leaps forward that seemed to be missing.  also who thinks i need new stirrups Just wait until you hear about the day I realized I was a Horse Training Goddess (tm). Full disclosure that one did not go the way I expected either.... [Read more]

The problem with ZB is one of her best features—she fits in zero off the rack things so impulse buying is dead. hi Plus y’know—most high end western stuff is designed to last like 700 years so it’s stiff and ugly colored until you put a couple years on it out in the sun and dust and rain.  So yeah I went full commit on the western schtick. Roxie’s mom told me what saddle to get, I found a 6” bit on eBay, grabbed a pair of reins from the feed store, and that was that. Well then I added the largest breast collar from the feed store too and the quality isn’t great because I bought the largest soft pre-oiled option that feels nice to start with and gets worse from there. But it looks fine for now.  winter scruff I love to scroll horse stuff on the socials and I’d cut a bitch for a nice French bridle but even I can’t justify $700 for a non-custom bridle.  But you know what is way cheaper And SPARKLES?  Yeah random western stuff.  they see her rollin I obviously spent way too much time trying to run down what was trendy for what discipline and how much it cost and you can FOR SURE spend all the dineros you would like when it comes to that. But like. For me.  I’m not showing. I don’t have a discipline. The world is my oyster.  shout out past me for buying sunflower slobber straps And while I visually LOVE straps, they’re goddamn annoying to put on. Plus you know how it is in the winter—you aren’t riding a ton, you’re shopping for presents, the algorithm is feeding you shit, your impulse control is at an all time low, etc.  she's so damn cute anyways that’s the story of how i decided i couldn’t live without this super minimalist headstall that i then immediately decided i needed to buy a noseband for because it was too minimal which then transitioned into switching over to a mecate set up but i obviously bought this STUNNING custom size sparkle piece and anyways hook a sister up if you see a deal on high end reins. this headstall is what dreams are made of Cough. Some things never change.  google decided you needed this photo and who am i to argue with our AI overlords?... [Read more]

I’m still here.  I mean, not really, inasmuch as I’ve mostly adapted to short form social media and instead of chronicling the very-personal-to-me horse things, I do some content creation for other outlets and let my relationship with my horse be mine to own.  I’m forever awed by the friendships I made through blogging and the people I still trek across the country to see. There is so much value I think in taking the time to reflect and write and grow as a person and a trainer and let that growth inform our steps.  The TL; DR of life since I was here last is I did a career pivot so I could be home more and moved ZB to a barn that’s further from my house but closer to my goals. It’s a really calm, quiet little place with excellent care and trail access right off the property. I’ve accepted that I have zero drive to compete in any event and I’m realizing just how much I enjoy connecting with my horse and learning together.  Also—after spending 6 years with ZB at the same barn, I opted to move her to the new place literally the day before a pretty epic winter storm and we’re in the midst of the wettest spring in over 120 years here, which means instead of worrying about training, I’m just taking things a day at a time.  The queen herself is (gasp) 11 this year, which is fucking insane. She’s had a couple “wild” moments as we’re learning the new place and olden days OTTB-riding me would have been shocked to learn what that looks like these days. There was some jigging. Also a spook at a spooky object. She still plays with legos (aka the mounting block) and anything else you leave around her, she’s still the smartest, kindest, most honest creature I’ve ever had the privilege to be around.  One thing I learned rather quickly was that there is a learning curve to riding your horse away from the barn when their friends might be running the fence line and screaming like complete idiots. Also if your horse isn’t spooked by traffic but you are, you’re going to start doing desensitization but to yourself. Fun fact: it would be easier if it was the horse. I’m fucking terrified of traffic.  I’m the problem it’s me. I thought my tack ho days might be behind us, but rest assured—I still can’t resist a pretty leather strap and I would cut a bitch to know where to find a nice 6” bit.  All that to say—hello.... [Read more]

I found myself off my usual path the other day. And 3 minutes from a cowboy tack store I'd never been to. I thought I'd pop in and see if they had the teal boots I so desperately need to complete ZB's western outfit game. i really love this picture sure could use teal boots They did not. Which is fine. But since I was already so far off the beaten path, it made sense to go just a little farther to see if the next tack store had said dream boots.  And.  They did not.  But what they did have was the purple version of my beloved teal reins.  You see these reins? They are the shit. Soft and sturdy with little hand stoppers to hang on to. Nice weight, happy colors. If I'm being picky, I'm a purple person, not a teal person, but teal is a really lovely color and ZB looks amazing in literally everything but snooze-fest-navy.  And yeah, I was looking at them in purple.  Now I know buying purple reins is the opposite of solving the teal boots problem but here's the thing: when has a little detail like that even slowed me down when I decide to go full tack ho?  Fact: it has not.  So then I had purple reins and I was headed back in a more usual direction when I drove past A THIRD TACK STORE that does like fancy custom cowboy shit and that I have never been to because A) it's far away from me and B) while I love playing cowboys, I'm not going to drop $$$$ on a legit set up to toodle around in.  But on a day like that, why wouldn't I stop?  she's in as long as there's snacks Even with the purple reins, I was trying to stay on message. I got a little bogged down debating what local friends I might be able to talk into producing a couple babies so I could justify the ADORABLE child's western saddle I found but even with that, TEAL BOOTS GODAMMIT. Teal. I already have the fancy matching pad. Let's go.  Do you know what I saw on the shelf at store #3? o hi Funny story.  Purple boots.  And hey! Guess who just happened to have two thumbs and matching reins?  I did browse the whole display but there was simply no teal to be found. None at all.  i mean everything is her color but HELLO So uh.  TL;DR I still don't have teal boots but now I need a purple saddle blanket.  Oh and in a strange twist that I wasn't going to include but here we are, apparently these conchos are a thing that exist and that can be added to any headstall you own. And can be made in any color you want.  I mean. So stick that in your pipe and smoke it.... [Read more]

I don't have a lot of cool things to say right now. Some parts of life are very good and some parts are very stressful. The ZB parts are very good. My little lady is probably mumbleover16handsmumble, is like sitting on my favorite couch, and is constantly getting compliments from other boarders for her gung-ho attitude and general perfection.  when you hit the sunset light just right My current focus is trying to break in my western saddle properly. Kinda. I can't really claim to be super focused. Due to not-ZB things, I'm trying to keep hobby stress low right now so messing around playing cow pony is about where my brain is at. a nicely cherry picked moment Did you know she's turning 9 this year?!  where does the time go? I really wanted to splurge and treat myself on fun teal western boots that were new and off the rack. Isn't that the whole point of having an adult job? You pay board and can afford to buy nice things at stores, LOL.  But.  Then every other animal I own decided that they'd like a pricey vet visit in the month of March so I guess I'm doing that instead.  I actually don't think she cares at all. I'm having a hell of a time figuring out how to transfer dressage training in a snaffle on the contact over to western pony on a loose rein in a curb.  Or at least. I thought I was.  LOOK HOW CUTE We "work" 1-2 times a week and all other rides are 30 minutes flat footed walk to build baseline fitness. It's been unseasonably warm and she's still A YAK so we're easing in. It's really fun right now. She is trying SO HARD and keeps experimenting with her balance and frame and trying to find the right answer. I feel like we had a good breakthrough last week so now I'm just working on my timing for rewarding her try.  we actually have these really nice balanced moments in a slow jog on a loose rein they aren't long, but they're so good I've spent a lot of time on walking days just breathing and letting time slow down--the feel of her back swinging underneath me, the spring grass starting to come in. I'm so lucky to have a horse like this and she matters more to me than anything other goals right now. ever unconventional It doesn't matter what tack she's wearing or how it looks to anyone else. I'm just enjoying the ride.... [Read more]

When new people at the barn meet Zoebird, they tend to ask the same question: What does she do?  Really not sure why "wear cute outfits and have lots of fun" isn't considered a polite answer.  We have this stupidly cute pink outfit for dressage that we put together. LACE ACCENTS. Yes. I need a shirt to match I think.  it's ok i'd be jealous of me too Then we took another ride on the western train and are building this awesome teal outfit. I KNOW SHE NEEDS BOOTS Plus there's this I-need-to-decide-if-i'm-going-purple-or-teal bareback outfit can you even with her cute level?  you cannot. Oh and the things she does in these outfits are like: fun fun Also hella fun. It just cracks me up to classify "what we do".  Like.  today we're jumpers because it's a figure 8! today we're dressage because sparkle browband! now ruggedly western ranch horse maybe even wearing a saddle! dramatic sunset pictures are always in style wow let's take another moment with this great outfit   ZB is such a smart lady. She doesn't need endless repetition. She needs fitness appropriate to the job I am asking her to do. She needs clarity and direction on what her job is. No matter what tack she's sporting or what we're "doing", I expect her to be calm, soft, and willing to move her balance forward and back when I request it.  lol what a cute horse! I really love this outfit I would love to get some lessons in this year. I really want to go on some field trips with ZB. We'll see if I make it happen (cross your fingers for SB gets to live in town for the first summer in a couple years).  yup loving this color on her With where we're at right now, I'm working on keeping a slightly open throatlatch with her nose poked out while moving forward in a level balance. I'm really enjoying using my pivo to keep me accountable here--she can't learn to go forward in a balance on a loose rein if I'm hanging on her face.  is my horse I find small things we can be successful at. Like. Eventually, I'd like to have a walk/lope transition on a loose rein in a level balance maintaining a steady rhythm. I don't have that today, so I focus on the balance and rhythm I want doing transitions from walk to trot (/jog, calm down). So what does she do?  IDK wear cute outfits and have fun, I guess. pictured: tiny dog not having fun... [Read more]

I love to do an orderly, month-by-month year end wrap up post highlighting our big adventures for each year.  Buuuuuuut this is probably the least orderly year I've ever had.  We kinda did everything. But also nothing.  I didn't take a single lesson, haul off site once, go trail riding in a substantive way, or make it to a clinic of any kind.  We did, however, cross off a bucket list item for me: canter my horse bareback through a field We also did the didn't-know-it-was-a-bucketlist-item: jump bareback in a halter We ticked off 2021 goals: lope in snaffle walk/job in curb You can always count on us for great hair: yup Great outfits: dressage western too! And great photo ops: always be a unicorn who is this fancy lady! We definitely plunked away at traditional training: peep new saddle pad stay posted for more on this And sometimes we did it in non-traditional ways: barebacksies! remember when she thought halters were optional? Sometimes we just plain did non-traditional things: tiny dog was NOT THRILLED about this queue 70 lbs puppy exiting stage left Can your dressage horse do this? We trained a new barn dog: the darling of all the barn ladies And ZB continued to be the most stand up lady for any adventure: family photo! The only time I made it to a horse show was when I accidentally ended up showing a mule at the state fair: NGL made me want ZB to have a mule baby But ZB looked fabulous no matter what we were doing: that shine <3 Whether we played cowgirls: shiny Or dressage pony: you're welcome for the outfit Or late night bareback adventure: sometimes you don't knock the mud off I can always count on her to be my very best lady horse. <3 I had her in training for the greater part of the year and for the first time ever, canter is just effortless and if I got my shit together, I actually think we'd lay down a really nice 1st level test. I'm really missing jumping right now so we're messing around with poles and fitness and seeing where that takes us. I don't know what next year will bring (other than another list of fun goals!) but I'm looking forward to spending it with very-much-grown-up baby mare.... [Read more]

this lady <3  A little over four years ago, I was in a bad place. I'd never met Roxie's mom, but we chatted online occasionally. She invited me up to trail ride her big, gorgeous Roxie horse.  (If you don't remember Roxiecorn the Horse Princess and her awesome mom, well, read this and follow their adventures here.) ROXIECORN <3 I remember cantering through the mountains, giggling like a kid on a pony. Safe. Happy.  I came home and made changes.  I lost a lot, but I gained far more.  horse pirates! I made plans to meet Halo Horsebaby the month she was born, but instead I nuked my entire life and had to deal with the fallout.  My path was northern last week and when I messaged Roxie's mom about meeting up, she hooked up the trailer and took me trail riding again. Halo is three now. I squealed when I saw her round little nose. Roxie's mom and I hit the trails again, and again, I was seated on the inimitable Roxie.  group picture! I'll always love that Roxiecorn for showing me another life.  My whole world is different than it used to be. the best There is something so strangely transcendent about riding through a golden sunset on a brisk fall day, looking through the same set of ears that rocked my world.  barebacksies Something about having the kind of friends that hook up the trailer and say "come ride my Roxiecorn".  Something about sharing a driving passion for life and horses.   and the horses that carry us Whether those rides are in the show ring or bareback alone at night, they're shaped me.  My expectations. My goals. My life.  that saddle pad tho It's little things like choosing a career that affords horses and a job that gives you some free time.  It's big things, like learning to hear what your horse says about you.  It's setting the standard for the people in your life. For who they are to you, and for who you want to be to them.  and trail rides in the forest I'm in a whole different place now than when I first met Roxie and her mom four years ago. It's a good place, full of opportunities and challenges.  I have my own horse princess now--if you're here, you know the inestimable ZB. and yes, she looks good in sparkles And yeah, it really can be all it's cracked up to be.  Stay hopeful, my friends.... [Read more]

aim high One of my goals from when I first brought ZB home was to canter bareback through the pasture with flowers braided in her mane.  Which probably doesn't sound that hard.  But.  To make that happen, these things had to come together: Let baby zb grow up with enough proprioception to move across uneven ground safely Develop her canter to something balanced enough to do on uneven ground safely Learn to feel confident and relaxed enough riding bareback that I don't just slide off Show up to the barn when the sun is up And maybe to most people, those things aren't insurmountable.  tiny barn dog not stoked Ms. Zoebird is a lovely trotting horse. It wasn't until she spent the better part of this year in pro training and can comfortably do a first level test that I actually felt confident enough with her canter that I wanted to take it out in the field regularly. Prior to this year, she required such a high level of fitness to do it that yeah I didn't make it happen.  It still never felt like something I wanted to do tho. I'm not about forcing my hobbies anymore. I can have goals, but if I don't get on and immediately think "this is a good idea", I just don't do it. Let's just say that when I sat on my very round horse in exercise tights, cantering never seemed like a super great plan. I'm a long ways out of the trendy horse world right now, but I have a fabulous group of friends who kept saying "brockamp pad" like it was some sort of voodoo that would help me.  I'm all in favor of voodoo, but 0/10 do long lead times on non-custom items.  And then I found this: Relevant points: PURPLE, less than half the price of name brand, can be at my house in 3 days. Sure, it's not the "THE PAD" but let's be real. I've never seen a real one so I won't know the difference. Worst case scenario, I end up with a pretty purple bareback pad.  So that happened. O HAI MUM Naturally, I dragged Alyssa out to the barn with me immediately.  warm weather Hopped on with zero prep and went straight to the field. don't mind if we do And rolled straight into the canter <3 It was the most natural thing in the world.  cold weather too It's my new favorite thing. We have a long, dark, cold winter ahead with a cheery purple bareback pad and a whole new toolbox unlocked.  i am a leaf on the wind watch how i soar... [Read more]

Photo edit by Beka When you have a Zoebird, there are certain things you can do that normal horses really can't.  One of those things is throw a little girl a unicorn birthday party.  (Note: none of the children are mine to share so I'm not showing faces/action shots, EVEN IF THEY HAVE REALLY CUTE SMILES.)  We started mid-week with a quick dress rehearsal.  Well no. It started with me saying "I'm throwing a unicorn birthday party" in front of a friend and she immediately volunteered to bring her sister and help.  Then we did a quick dress rehearsal. Turns out the $20 etsy horn needed a little reinforcement to prevent a rather unfortunate flopping situation. And we picked correct sparkles. And made a plan.  When party day arrived, #teamunicorn was on site early to get all decked out. the ideal horse model We (they--let's be real my only contribution was a tail braid) got everything ready, then took the world's most adorable unicorn out to walk around and do a final fit.  We did a couple quick tweaks to dial the outfit in and it was go time with Alyssa was on hand to document! O HAI CHILDS I mean. ZB is a really damn cool horse and her love of the littles is possibly the most adorable thing I have ever seen.  They petted her and learned how to feed her treats (and brought BAGS of carrots and apples so it was 100% the best horse day ever).  And then we did pony rides!  Pro tips: 1) BO suggested the indoor to contain the party participants. This was an excellent idea. 2) A 3 step mounting block is not tall enough to get the littles on your percheron cross (but helpful parents are great for this!) 3) Remember to ask the parents to bring helmets, because your adult size helmets will be WAY too big (glad I thought of that one in time!) 4) Should definitely ask everyone to wear closed toe shoes. Again. Did not think of that.  It was a really fun time! The kids were so excited and the parents helped manage the chaos (as did Alyssa and co--it's definitely a lot to throw 10+ kids and their non-horsey parents into a barn situation).  And ZB.  not pictured--actual children By now, you know she is the best horse ever.  But like.  Not a foot wrong. The whole time. My proudest moment was having a little girl up who simultaneously LOVED Zoe and was COMPLETELY TERRIFIED. We were in the farthest, darkest corner of the arena and every child not-on-Zoe took off running straight at her AT FULL SPEED.  I stopped dead. ZB didn't even flick an ear.  Nada.  Just taking care of the scared little girl on her back.  You guys that is the cutest thing I have seen IN MY LIFE. I'm living for these photo edits I'm certainly not planning to get into the unicorn party business*, but it was so much fun to make a little girl's day memorable.  Local unicorn team. Should have made Alyssa get in the picture instead of take it. *No one tell ZB I said this. She is living to be a party unicorn.... [Read more]

There are some animals that you look at.  There are others that look back at you.  Lewis was one of those. From the time he came home at 11 weeks old, he was a force to be reckoned with. Intelligent. In charge. Determined.  When men sat down on the couch, Lewis would walk up and stick his nose directly in their crotch. To see who backed up.  wasn't usually him When I wouldn't let him outside, he'd bark at an imaginary squirrel to rile up the other dogs, then casually stroll out the now-open door while they lost their minds on a wild goose chase through the back yard.  Less accomplices, more pawns After a very serious CTJ moment about "we don't chase horses" on one of his first visits, Lewis became my faithful barn buddy.  He never was a fan of posing with ZB The barn was our time. Well. Sort of. He had more friends at the barn then I did. To this day, he knows more people at my barn than I do. And they know him. When my life started falling apart, late nights at the barn were me, ZB, and Lewis. Always the boss of us.  He never suffered from a lack of personality--one of my favorite moments was when he strolled past me in the barn parking lot with the entire bin of Mrs. Pastures horse cookies in him mouth.  And went and set them by my car to take home.  He wasn't a dog. He was my dog. My dude. The one who got me. The one who showed up, cheered me up, and kept my world moving, even while everything was crashing down around me.  He was always thinking, always judging, always bossing. He knew what he wanted and he knew how to get it.  He was turning 13 this year but he was strong and sassy and just took a few more naps than he used to. This spring, I even said I wanted to get a puppy while Lewis was still young enough to raise him.  Because I wanted any dog coming in to my life to learn from Lewis about how things were and how things needed to be.  there appears to be a shortage of bowls puppy must learn to remove ALL SQUEAKERS This summer, he slowed down a little more. He didn't go on long walks. I was more careful about not taking him to the barn when it was hot.  But it was ok.  It had to be ok.  I needed him to be ok.  the way corgs use couches Except when my SO called as I was headed out of town to say that Lewis didn't eat breakfast.  I turned my ass around and took him straight to the vet for bloodwork.  no buddy. mum's not ready. Bloodwork. Then imaging. Waiting for specialists. Hearing bad news. Hearing worse news.  "We can treat it, maybe", followed by the quality of life talk.  Drugs. So many drugs. Buying fancy treats and canned food and god fucking dammit we can fight this.  until we can't A few short days later, he told me it was time.  Farewell, my friend.... [Read more]

I'm re-teaching myself how to train right now, and it is so much fun.  I've spent a long time in the same rut. The english sport horse world is cool and challenging and diverse and allllllll my bad habits are formed around a couple decades of experience doing the same thing.  Meaning.  If say, I'm trying to bend around a turn and I'm not quite getting the response I want, I have this muscle memory that goes INDIRECT INSIDE REIN (terrible idea, 0/10 recommend) that makes the shape of the horse look the way I want it to look while the horse goes crooked and I continue my bad habit of relying on my hands.  I know enough to know how to pull it together and fake it on a ride. I don't even have to think about it. Faking it does not make us better.  And see. I'm spending a lot of time in my life breaking out of ruts and changing behavior patterns. Learning to recognize dysfunction in it's expression and adapt my approach to do better.  not related but this horse is cute AF For me, it starts with changing my surroundings--if I physically remove myself from a rut, I can be more aware of when my behavior is sliding back that direction. In life, that means taking myself out of situations that I know are problematic for me. On horseback, that means dropping the trappings I'm comfortable with and learning to ride a different way.  Next I set goals--what does success look like today? Tomorrow? Next week? Next month? Next year? If my long term goal is "canter bareback through the fields with flowers braided in her mane", what steps do I need to accomplish to arrive there? (Might start with "rideable canter idk"). As I move towards the goals, I start watching for patterns. Which behaviors move me closer to my goal and which move me farther away? Which behaviors that I exhibit make my life better and which are just learned dysfunctional coping mechanisms? If I ride 6 days a week, but every ride is exhausting and draining and non-productive, am I gaining anything? Am I better served by riding less often and keeping a fresher mind? The thing that can drive me insane about western riding is the total lack of hundreds of years of theory and a "one true way" sort of approach that comes along with the more classical disciplines. But.  That means I have to feel it out as I go. Find my own way.  Lead, but softly.  Strength tempered with understanding.  Progress in balance.  There are things I can respect and take away from the sporthorse masters. There is plenty to learn from newer schools of thought.  At the end of the day, I need to find the things that work for me. I need to be the leader that my horse wants to follow.  There's no trail to glitz and satin and recognition. It's a step by step process of creating the horse I want to ride, the person I want to be, and the partnership I want to be party to.... [Read more]

I see horses as a mirror that allows me to see into my subconscious in ways that very few other things do.  What drives me. What motivates me. How do I talk to myself about it. How do I think about myself because of it. What am I trying to gain. What am I willing to give up to get what I think I need.  We can psychoanalyze that all day (and it's fascinating on a certain level), but the practical ramifications are interesting.  I took Zoe down the ditchbank the other day. She was predictably slow away from home, then a little scooty wanting to go back to it. She can be mildly herd bound if she's not getting out regularly and she definitely does better if we do a couple rides with a buddy before I just launch into a long solo ride as we lose daylight.  And like.  She wasn't bad. She was a little jiggy. She stopped when I asked her. She wanted to be pushy, so I pushed her into a shoulder fore down the trail and she was like MUM UR SO MEAN THIS IZ HARD BOO but she did it.  I knew that I didn't handle it well. I didn't really establish myself. I didn't train my horse. I just totally abdicated all responsibility, had a crummy ride back, didn't school it, didn't reassure her. I felt irritated, then untacked and went home.  And when you have an actual disney horse, you can do that and she's still great the next time you see her. But maybe you don't take her down the ditch bank again because your coping skills are just not that good right now and you're having a hard time. You know that SOMEONE needs to school her, but you need it to not be you.  So you play in the arena but GODDAMN you want her dialed and soft and ON IT right TF now and since you ride like ass (a conservative assessment), she's kind of stiff and heavy and not super engaged. It's ok. It's not terrible. She's not flipping you the bird, but like. Things aren't right.  I went home. It's cold. I'm tired. The SO says "how was Zoe" and I have to explain to him how actually, she was pretty good. It's just that I expected a lot. And demanded a lot. And didn't give her any release.  And actually what I interpreted as "her being heavy" was really "me refusing to give".  And "her being stiff" was more accurately "me being rigid".  As I explained all that, I realized that stupid mirror thing was happening again. She's fine. She's just being a horse. But when I don't have the emotional capacity to provide good training, she's going to be a bit lackluster.  When I respond to her responding to me with an unyielding YOU WILL GIVE, all I'm doing to her is what I do to myself.  Which is never give myself room to fail. I demand more, push harder, get through it, and when I do that, I penalize myself for my very humanity that is begging for a little mercy.  I'm hard. I'm strong. It's a weakness.  She's better than that. She's so just... I dunno. Inherently kind and pure. She brings her whole self every day and does her very best. She deserves someone who says "you can have an off day and it's ok and you're still my #1". She has earned that a thousand times over. And it's true--she can have those things. She just needs me to recognize it.  She needs me to release. Now switch the pronouns in that statement. Like the mirror does. Show me how I talk about myself.  What am I willing to give up to get what I think I need. I can have an off day and it's ok. That's a really hard concept for my overly-driven, very-intense self.  I can tell my trainer that I need her to put a few rides on zb and then we'll take a couple lessons.  And then I can go to the barn after work and ride my beautiful disney horse in a halter. Feed her cookies and say I'm sorry.  I'll do better for both of us.... [Read more]

My favorite part of blogging is the perspective I get from looking forward and looking back, especially at the end of the year. Usually I go through month by month and link to my favorite posts and put the best pictures of the year together and come out like "wow, you really did something" and "look what you need to do to move forward".  Look who goes barebacksies in a halter! But.  I think we've all been living in the same 2020. I didn't even blog every month. Barely every quarter.  Rather than doing a monthly summary, I'm going to roll with the 2020 summary post I've seen making the rounds, that I believe is credited to Alberta Equest.  2020 Summary What's the best thing that happened to you in 2020?  Personal: HAHAHAHA OH MY GOD. Um. I'm an extrovert. I'm REAL BAD at shutdowns. I have a VERY HARD TIME with like. Not leaving my house. My life being out of control. It has been really hard for me to work through isolation (/living with my own idiosyncrasies) and seeing how those issues impact the BF (we live together) and how my own character weaknesses create my biggest problems.  So like. I have a whole new appreciation for my own flaws and a roadmap forward to working on them.  Also some great new coping mechanisms.  is truck collecting a mechanism? Equestrian: I spent a lot of time away from the barn this year. That solidified for me why it is I go there, which has been really good. I didn't have an amazing achievement, didn't go to a show, barely took lessons, but I really am starting to feel settled/comfortable with the way my horse fits around my life right now. It's not what it used to be but it's still very much something that matters to me.  I was really struggling with the lack of proficiency I feel when I'm riding at a lower level than I remember being able to, but it's letting me take the pressure off and just enjoy my personal horse. It's a new thing for me, and damn, I like it.  What's the worst thing that happened to you in 2020?  Personal: I really dislike the passivity of saying things "happened to me" when I am an agent of my own life and I like to think I have some influence on the things I put myself in the position to have happen to me. Obviously, the whole pandemic didn't "happen to me", it happened to the entire world and I'm just a very small, very privileged part of that.  But a lot of things kind of just happened this year.  I guess for me it was having people I care very much about be isolated in a way I can't overcome and know that they have to be alone for reasons out of both of our control. Equestrian: I watched a couple of friends go through really challenging situations with their horses and wasn't able to be there with them/for them in the way I would like to.  What was your biggest purchase in 2020?  Personal: Ummmmmm we'll go ahead and call my beloved Truck Truck a personal item. I was the sort of kid who had a dream truck and gave zero fucks about fancy dress parties and now I can officially say I have the truck of my actual dreams. It's a strangely lucid thing that I am really excited about. Almost offsets how expensive trucks are.  Almost.  Ha.  Equestrian: I keep saying I dialed back the horse spending this year, but a quick review shows that I bought bought a jump saddle and a western saddle. So there's that. I made it official with a loaner jump saddle from the ever-intrepid Roxie's mom and then when we decided to get a little ranchy, she pointed me in the direction of a saddle that actually fits ZB really well. In an odd twist for me, I didn't sell any other saddles to accommodate the purchase either so I should probably clear some inventory... soon. Maybe. Iunno what else am I going to put in my garage...  *giggle* What was your biggest accomplishment in 2020?  Personal: I'm on a challenging career track in a male-dominated field and I had some huge professional achievements this year. I could give you some work highlights and things I am proud of, but at the end of the day, the thing that matters most to me is having the respect of my crews and leadership. I feel like I'm in a really good place with that.  putting that horse girl carhartt coat to work Equestrian: Ummmmmm. Well. My goal with Zoe is always just to have a pleasant, well-rounded horse that I can bomb around on and she came through in a major way this year. I've been on the road a lot, my barn time is limited, and every time I see her, it's just solid, consistent fun things.  So. It's not a show highlight. It's a life highlight. LEGOS What do you feel COVID robbed you of in 2020?  Personal: Friendships. Oh my god. It's not that you can't have friends in the time of covid, but the little get togethers and spontaneous hangouts and the quick weekend road trip to see people I care about are all just gone. I care about my friends and I hate that in order to protect each other, we're forced into an all-encompassing isolation.  gonna eat this sad pizza by my sad self Equestrian: I could say I was kind of dabbling with the idea of going to a show, but realistically, that wouldn't have happened this year with how other pieces of my life played out. In a lot of ways, I am singularly lucky that my horse life was minimally impacted by the larger tragedies swirling around us this year.  HAI CHRIMMIS TREE Were you subject to any COVID impulse buys in 2020?  Personal: HAHAHA see also my entire amazon account.  Equestrian: I can actually pretty much justify both the saddles I bought as things that would have happened anyways. I got a really pretty pad that I definitely didn't need but #yolo. Ummmmm oh yeah there was also a COVID sale for hufglocken and I got a super nice Mattes pad too. A draft size western bridle. At least 3 girths.  it just occurred to me how funny it would be to put all the impulse buys on her at once but who has the time? It a little bit bothers me that I'm publishing this in 2021 but that's one of those things I'll just have to let go. We're moving forward. Things are good. I have a few more low key goals. Maybe next I'll write a post for that!... [Read more]

Y'all have probably heard of this nifty little robot camera gadget called a Pivo. I thought it sounded cool and I bought one. I read half of one how-to on using it and figured if I needed help once I got going, I could google it. It works exactly as advertised--tracks the horse, struggles with multiple horses, and if it loses you, just ride in front of it again.  Cool. Whatever. Pretty much everyone on the internet has one now and there's an entire facebook group devoted to people who are too stupid to read the instructions. You don't need me for that.  You definitely needed this level of cuteness tho The Pivo comes with a handy dandy remote that I think most people carry with them and use to turn the tracking features on/off as needed. Right? Like you maybe don't want a 30 minutes walk warmup of you talking to your buddy but you probably do want the 5.5 minutes you trotted around in the good light trying to get a decent screenshot. (Just me? Whatever.) But since I'm lazy level pro right now, I don't use the remote for the simple reason of I didn't bother to bring it. Ever. It's somewhere. Maybe at home. I literally plop the pivo on the mounting block, try not to kick it over when I get on, and go for a ride. I trot around for a bit (and yeah by the time I'm WIPED OUT, apparently it's been like 5.5 minutes), and then I pop off to stop the pivo while we take a quick break.  Nobody wants to screenshot long videos That means two things: 1) I get adorable photos like the one above.  2) I have a chance to review the footage MID RIDE. This has turned out to be BY FAR my favorite feature. (Even more than screenshots, because the light in the indoor is crummy so even a really good screenshot on a pretty decent phone camera is still not good.) See? Real talk tho: I'm a working ammy. I think I took 1 lesson this year. I ride 1-4 times a week, depending on my work travel schedule/the weather/my mental state. I have ok feel, middlin' reflexes, and bad riding fitness. ZB is the perfect ammy horse in that my schedule is A OK with her (and if I'm there more than 4 days she's like OMG MUM GO ON A TRIP I TIRED HOKAY).  That means I get on and bomb around for 5 minutes working on whatever THE THING I think I need to do is. Last night, I thought "we will work on forward!" um It was hard. I was huffing and puffing and contorting myself and nagging with my legs and god only knows what the reins were doing.  Then we took our mid-ride break and I watched the video. And I thought.  "Well gee whiz. Sure is hard for my perfectly nice horse to try to figure out what I want when my reins are two miles long, my hands are bouncing all over the stratosphere, my legs never really come on or off her sides, and my body is oddly contorted." In fact, you might even think that if I was clear with the FORWARD aids, then I could be long in my legs, strong in my core, following with my elbows, and soft with my hands.  What a concept.  Reset Pivo. Round 2.  It's not that I'm magically a better and fitter rider with the video review. It just shows me what my issues look like. That helps me pick a couple things to correct on that night based on how I'm riding in the moment. I have to be real honest about whether the things I'm doing are actually making a difference to my horse.  Or if they are dumb things and the difference they are making is bad.  oh that's a bit better I'm not a great rider. I'm not going to become one on my current schedule.  I'm ok with that about myself.  It is my ongoing goal to be the best I am able with the resources I have on hand, and to do that, I need to be very clear and fair with my horse. She can be her best self when I set her up to succeed.  now that's almost something After watching the videos and reviewing the stills I pulled out of them, I can make some informed choices about our next ride. I can say that the best work we had all night was when we did lateral work and compression and then pushed forward and asked for stretchy trot.  I definitely think the things I'm asking for right now are hard and require schooling, more for strength than for repetition itself.  LEGOS I also know we both get bored of doing the same thing over and over. Will there be indoor jump video in the near future?  MAYBE.... [Read more]

I could write about how I finally decided ZB's western saddle actually didn't fit, and then how I maniacally shopped for one that would, then somewhat unintentionally bought one, then was pleasantly surprised that it included fittings and a cute teal pad and now I want cute teal boots to match and figured out I need a shorter girth.  that back end <3 But like.  What's more important is that then I went on the ultimate horse girl spending spiral and ended up with a horse-hauling truck so WHOOPS THAT HAPPENED.  when all your wildest dreams come true I'm still processing that particular event (and uh paying for it) and this blog is about the cutest horse in all the land, so let's look at her.  so cute We're on a western kick right now and a large part of it is that I don't have to be super prepared about outfits when I can just wear cowboy boots and jeans from work to the barn.  Another part is that I am really enjoying the process of tackling something new.  also soccer I have to think through every ask and every give. I have to know what I want and work with ZB to figure out how to show it to her. I have to know when to push and know when to release. If the goal is "polite, balanced western jog", what are the steps I need to take to get from here to there?  It's also really cool because it ends up being the same skills--I'm looking for her to be balanced back to front and move forward softly. I want the cadence slower and I want her to self regulate a bit. She can't stick her nose out like a pony and run on the forehand if I want her to go on a loose rein and be accountable for herself, so I have to be very clear about the steps I need her to take.  ground tying is fun That means I have to step up as a horseman. I have to be accountable for my movements and expectations. I have to be clear, calm, and consistent. If I want a particular response, am I asking with a particular aid? How am I setting her up to succeed?  This is ZB and I we're talking about, so that training has to be interesting with a lot of variety. She struggles with the canter (especially transitions), so we school those on the ground with a quick lunge warm up. Or in english tack so I can influence her balance and stay off her back. Or ignore it completely and go for a hack under the stars during a full moon. I think we're about ready for prime time in the canter (aka actually schooling the lope vs just bombing around from time to time), but first I'm definitely going to resolve the cinch situation.  Or maybe we'll just do it bareback.... [Read more]

You know what we haven't done in a while?  dun dun dun A progression post!  When I met ZB, she was a loveable 4 year old with an impossibly smooshy nose that seemed almost too large for her rather-slender body. She was 15.2 on a tall day and had the best lil attitude about absolutely everything.  Summer 2017 - 4 years old (layover at her Auntie's house) Everyone warned me that drafties grow until they're 8 so it worked out that my whole life fell apart shortly thereafter. I mean it didn't work out for me for a long time (tho it did eventually), but this is a REALLY NICE PHOTO that ZB's other auntie took the next summer annnnnnd yeah you can see that her dimensions have changed a lot.  Summer 2018 - 5 years old (it's two zbs!) I was going to post a summer vs winter picture for each year but 1) apparently I don't take a lot of winter conformation shots without tack on and 2) uhhhhhh let's just agree that some of those winter growth phases DO NOT need to be more documented haha. Instead, let's look at summer 2019 when the pieces actually started to come together for my little lady.  You'll have to use some imagination on this one--I have a habit of not living in state in the summer (or at all SOB) so this was my best conformation shot in like 4 months. Whoops. Summer 2019 - 6 years old Looking like a little powerhouse I now realize I probably should have been more diligent about documenting her growth--I think she's about 15.3 in front and 16.0 behind now. My logic is that I can get on her from the ground so she can't be that big. SOME PEOPLE are fond of pointing out that if your horse is roughly the same diameter as your couch, it keeps your hips more mobile. Whatever her height, she's the right size for me.  She does seem to have leveled out the exponential growth at least--her balance is more consistent and hey, she looks like this: Summer 2020 - 7 years old All sport-horsey and cute We're going into her 7 year old winter now feeling fit and sassy. We both like variety and adventures, so we're spending time learning to neck rein and do a western jog but also working hard on the canter (and omg transitions) in her english tack with plenty of trail rides and jump days thrown in. She is coming together SO nicely and I can never emphasize enough just how lovely she's been to work with for the entire process.  She has a fantastic back end, a natural over track at the walk, solid bone, and an amazing brain. I could talk about how her conformation impacts her athleticism or how her breeding informs her dimensions, but you know what's most important?  She's just so much fun.... [Read more]

An interesting thing has started happening lately.  Right now (I've been in town for almost a month omfg!), Zoe is in the most consistent work with me that she has been in a long time. She's worked harder before, but that was with weekly training rides by a competent professional. I am not a competent professional, nor have I played one on tv in a long time. (Or ever, let's be real.) Point is. ZB is working harder and more often than she has in a minute.  As much as I go on and on about her lovely, can-do attitude, I have definitely been wondering lately about what horse I'd have when the pressure went up a little.  And another thing--the first summer I had ZB, a lovely trainer we did a clinic with pointed out that to move her along in dressage, I'd need to sensitize her to stimuli.  Make her hotter, if you will.  I was a few months off a hotter-than-hell horse and that sounded like the worst idea on the planet to me.  So I didn't do it. (And then my whole life fell apart and I basically quit riding, but who's counting?)  NO RAGERTS That creates a twofold issue now--we're adding pressure and I'm dialing up her sensitivity. I'm saying REACT QUICKER and MORE REACTIONS and both of those things are new. Her response is a mixed bag--she definitely handles pressure better than any horse I've had before. She's willing to step up and try hard and give me good work, day in and day out.  She also (very fairly) has some of her own ideas about how that should go down.  O HAI I'm having a fabulous time problem solving our way through it. I dialed up her reactions (great!) but then when I tried to do a bareback-in-a-dress photoshoot after work one day, she was like OMG LIONZ, which was kind of funny because I'm pretty sure she'd just SMOOSH LION if she actually met one.  It's not a bad thing per se, it's just a different item to address. WE REACTIN HOKAY MUM I also have no interest in mindlessly drilling her like YOU WILL DO 5000 TRANSITIONS because fuck that noise. I'm not that person and I don't want to be. Like if you are that person, maybe get an RC car or something because you will break a living being. #shade Which brings us back to our usual training path.  do we have a usual path My biggest thing about not wanting to "sensitize" my non-reactive horse was that I did not want to create a dragon-monster-horse that lost it's shit over stupid things like a stereotypical dressage arena princess. Zero interest. Got ZB to not have that horse.  But we're fooling around western and you know what a good western horse is?  dramatic in photos? wait no Sensitized.  Dialed in to their rider on a low wavelength energy. It's not about being hot and reactive--it's about being keyed in and responsive.  It's about the rider being clear and consistent, providing the same subtle aids.  It's about the horse being soft with it's mind and body, carrying itself forward.  got kickass pictures too. cake=had and eaten. OH MY GOD WE JUST WENT FULL CIRCLE DID ANYONE ELSE SEE THAT. Ahem.  Please tell me you saw that.  I'm working on becoming the best version of myself. Say after me: Clear, consistent aids. Clear, consistent aids. Clear, consistent aids. It's a lot harder than you'd think. Remember how we had a jump lesson like a week ago and my position was totally bangin' and I was totally mentally like "GOOD JOB SELF YOU ARE SUCH A SUPER RIDER WELL DONE"?  Well then we had an impromptu jump night and all the things I did right in the lesson, I managed to do wrong. See also: run at fence, pick to the base, fling entire upper body at miniscule X.  And definitely always go for the long one Strangely, our performance was less brilliant that day. Even my gung-ho, jump-loving baby horse was like NO MUM IS NOT SAFE 4 JUMPIN and slammed on the brakes. Whoops.  The cool thing with horses is that they don't really hold grudges, tho. I cleaned up my ride, and she gave me different results. Clear, consistent responses to clear, consistent aids.  It's almost like.  Who is training who? Welcome to uncharted territory.... [Read more]

I've been able to ride consistently enough lately that I actually felt ok scheduling a lesson last week.  And then I thought.  Let's make it a jumping lesson!  literally the cutest Here's the entire history of Zoe jumping:  1) we spent a lot of days on the ground/lunge line learning how to go through poles and not fall down one winter  2) One day, my barnmate was like "does she jump" and I was like "iunno let's find out" and apparently she does.  3) Since that day, we've had about 4 random days where we popped over wee single cross rails to the tune of less than 10 jumps each time.  4) and then we were signed up for our first ever jump lesson  outfit on point, as always Not gonna lie, when I saw my trainer setting up an entire course of jumps, I was like "uh yeah so do you realize this horse has never jumped more than one fence in a row IN HER ENTIRE LIFE and yeah I was thinking some trot poles and a crossrail or something?"  Trainer was like "oh yeah totes this is for the lesson after you no worries".  And that's the story of how whether or not it was intended for the lesson after us, ZB and I jumped AN ENTIRE COURSE for the FIRST TIME IN OUR COMBINED LIVES.  Also that's my first course since uh.............  Wow like 2015? I don't even know. Been a minute.  And it was the cutest thing ever.  I could go on and on about how she's the most fun to ride and how cool it is to have a horse that lets me sit in the middle and steer because she thinks jumping is THE FUNNEST OMG MUM and how cool it is to like, "work on my position" because I'm not just desperately clinging on and trying to avoid death.  But you probably guessed those things anyways from how it's ZB.... [Read more]

When I typed out "I've literally never had a bad ride on zb" the other day, it made me think.  What is a bad ride? What causes a ride to become a bad ride?  For me, a bad ride is emotionally turbulent, accomplishes no clear goal, leaves horse and/or rider more frustrated than when they started, or ends in injury for horse or rider.  That's not to say that every ride has to be all-positive, all-the-time, 100% training focused. I mean, if you've been around here at all, you definitely know that I spend more time toodling than working my horse and I am 100% more focused on playing horse soccer than I am on going to horse shows. And while I certainly gush about ZB's (many) (many) excellent qualities, she's also a bit of a moose on the ground and not always the most motivated under saddle.  Albeit a very cute moose A bad ride is more than an "eh not feeling it, let's redirect and trail ride today" where not much is accomplished. I would actually call that a pretty decent ride as long as you identify the issue and make intentional choices to address it.  One of those moments of clarity I found in between Courage and Zoe was this understanding that a partnership depends on being the person your horse wants to be with and finding the horse that you want to be with. It sounds oddly simple phrased that way.  But like.  It's not that every day is butterflies and rainbows.  It's that when I'm toodling around bareback in the pasture on a loose rein on the first cold fall day of the year and my horse goes COMPLETELY TENSE OMFG WTAF IS HAPPENING, I choose to slide off, do some ground work, address where our attention goes and when, and then choose a successful note to end on.  Could have been a bad ride. Might have gone ok. I addressed it in a different way.  That not to say one shouldn't ride through resistance because you 100% should, some of the time. It's important to set yourself up to win the little battles so you never really have the big battles. The other day I hopped on and ZB was definitely "eh not feeling it" on the going to work issue.  We started with halt/back/halt/walk transitions to confirm "you must comply in a soft manner", then added trot into the mix, which got the whole Going Forward/Stepping Under pieces engaged. Then lateral work for straightness, then figure eights with bend/counterbend for direction changes with consistent balance.  And all of a sudden, I had this lovely, soft, balanced horse who was on the aids and I asked her to stay soft and step up into canter (vs hollow and run), and wouldn't you know, she did it. And we could repeat the transitions. She wasn't strong/consistent enough yet to hold it for more than a few strides, but for the first time, she totally got it.  Lightbulb.   That wasn't the most promising start, but it became a good ride.  I'll admit I'm 100% spoiled here. Ms. Zoebird has this ridiculous Disney horse attitude and shows up for work 99.99% of the time. She's good natured, hard working, and lovely to be around. She makes it easy. Even if she really just needs to OMG MUM G2G BUCK AND DO RUNNIN, she lets me know that's on the table and tries so hard to make sure I get off first.  She's never going to be your international eventer and I dunno if she wants to dressage once the dressaging gets hard, but she's the horse that made riding fun again for me.  People have bad days. Horses have bad days.  If you're both having a bad day, it's maybe not the best day in the history of ever to get on.  More than that tho--good rides are about good fit. Good goals. Good camaraderie.  On a personal level, it has mattered a lot to me to take showing off the table. Instead of sort of patching together an uncertain partnership in pursuit of indifferent public approbation of my skills, I've gotten to zero in on the things I want out of riding and what I enjoy.  It's not that showing is bad, because it isn't.  It's that having a good ride is so much more natural when "good" is a finite term that I can see and feel and touch. It's that moment of appreciating my horse and knowing that I'm in the right place at the right time. It's the ability to take a day or a month or a season to teach her goofy things that make me laugh. The other day, I wanted to win a shiny satin ribbon. I'm spending a little more time polishing show ring skills than I did before. I have a goal of taking a couple lessons to advance our skills that I think I can finally accomplish.  Maybe we'll give showing a go next season.  Maybe we won't.  Either way, we have many more good rides to look forward to.... [Read more]

It's weird how our foray into learning western stuff re-energized me for all things horsey, but here we are. And like. I know I never stop going on and on about how great ZB is, but seriously she is the actual greatest and I love her so much.  So anyways. We've been westerning. I dragged my moose sized western saddle out and I can't really tell if it fits or not. To trot around for 20 minutes, it's fine I guess, so we started playing with a little more complexity in our neck reining adventure.  SMOOSH SUNSET I decided to clean up my tack explosion area at the barn and realized that since I'm not riding often or hard enough to justify juggling two saddles and ten pads on one saddle rack and the top of my trunk, that I ought to just take the dressage saddle and to-die-for otto bridle home where they're safe.  And then I tried riding in my jump saddle.  I realized these things: 1) I hate my stirrup leathers more than life itself 2) Neither of my girths fit my horse 3) The girths are so bad I literally can't use my $$$ custom mattes pad that I impulse bought in a 'rona sale this spring And see, despite my total moderation in tack purchases lately, I have (un?)fortunately cultivated a lovely group of very tack savvy friends.  In less time that it takes to talk about it, I have: 1) Custom-made Gary Mundy stirrup leathers with my initials stamped in them on the way 2) 3 (count 'em) girths to try out 3) A bonus anatomic noseband that is oddly sized to mess with Stay posted for the prolite vs county logic throw down Well that is surprisingly perfect Oh look it's the indoor time of year I'm one of those weird people that like CANNOT EVEN if things aren't working. I didn't realize how much it bugged me that my tack wasn't quite right.  Which is dumb.  Because after playing musical girths and messing around, I got on with a saddle and rode like an adult and ZB was super champion of the world. Seriously. I don't know why she's like ROCK SOLID HOKAY MOM I BE GOOD GIRL literally every time I have EVER sat on her, but it's insane and amazing. Still.  Seriously horse it's been over three years now and WE HAVE LITERALLY NEVER HAD A BAD RIDE.  And I don't even feel like I'm jinxing it by saying that out loud.  And then because I am a dumbass, I pulled her saddle off and walked away to put it on the rack with her loose wearing the fancy new bridle in the middle of the arena.  And yeah it was totally fine she just stood there and watched me.  when ur mum is a dum dum but u still love her... [Read more]

In the vein of "what sounds fun today", I spent a lot of time this summer in a distinctly old west style locale.  Is that a buffalo walking down the street? Yes that's a buffalo walking down the street. His name is Jackson. And I thought.  Ms ZB is literally a purpose-bred ranch horse.  Oh and she's looking completely fabulous Why not teach her to western? So one night, I googled "how to teach a horse to neck rein", read one of those horrible how-to articles on some random site, and decided to go for it. Worst case scenario, we can't figure it out, I feed her cookies, and all is well.  Did I mention she's looking fantastic? She totally is. I mean, I don't have a western saddle that's moose shaped and given my status as a tack snob, I can't make do with the cheapest thing on ebay. But also ZB is a literal couch and we have plenty of easy, slow work we can do before we need to, I don't know, zoom around and sort cows and rope a calf while practicing mounted shooting.  Bareback it is!  My preliminary research indicated if your horse was already reasonably broke and had a good idea of direct reining, the neck reining wasn't terribly different and horses usually picked it up pretty quickly.  I'd call that summation accurate--ZB is one smart lady and as long as she stays focused on what I'm asking, she's quite lovely about the whole thing. It honestly wasn't much of a transition for her in terms of steering. (Now, in terms of how we pretty it up, I dunno. Might take some lessons lol.)  BUT.  Did you know that riding a horse is kind of like riding a horse and any imbalances, weaknesses, or flaws that you mask with your usual equipment might show up in a whole different way if, say, you dropped most of your tack and tried to provide clear, simple aids?  Cough.  I know that.  Now.  I mean it's literally what I talk about when I transfer the skills learned kicking her ball into letting me pop on in a different setup and start muttering a different language and asking ZB to cooperate.  But it's funny how much the whole bareback-on-a-round horse tells on my tendency to evaporate my right seat bone and curl up my right side when I'm trying to stay balanced and in the middle and strong with my core and consistent with my legs so I can let the reins mean something. (Pro tip: you honestly don't do a whole lot with the reins. It's really more how you ride OH WEIRD WHERE HAVE I HEARD THAT BEFORE).  gonna be cowboys TL; DR  Riding is fun, ZB is fantastic, hope your summer is great.... [Read more]

I've been working out of town, which severely limits barn time.  But I have a ZB.  #winning So when I had 48 hours in town a few weeks back, Nadia asked if I wanted to haul out to go trail riding and the obvious answer was YES.  ZB has never hauled a ton and definitely not in the last year.  O HAI And it is so freaking cool to have a horse that I just loaded onto a trailer she'd never seen, took to a place she hasn't been in a long time, hop on, and go. (Ok hop on=train her how to back off a straight load, which took a minute, but then she got it.)  JOONBUG R WALKIN VERY FAST She led. She followed. She crossed boggy ground, walked by scary things, and never batted an eye.  ZB R DYIN By the end, she was SO TIRED, but gamely hopped back in the trailer and headed home like a total champ.  And then used her new-found "backing off the trailer" skills.  TL; DR she is the absolute best and hopefully next I will write about some of our exciting continuing adventures.... [Read more]

I drafted a blog the other day, but it bored me to write. I can't imagine trying to read it. The gist of it was that ZB and I aren't really doing much because blah blah blah excuses.  And I thought.  I hate excuses.  What's the real issue here? It's not that "waaaaah it's hot and I'm tired and I'm not a pro and my legs aren't strong enough to make my horse go forward and I'm tired of kicking" because you know what.  She goes just fine when I ask her to.  It's definitely that I'm bored to tears of going in circles and soldiering away in the summer dust for some abstract goal of impressing a judge at a show I literally don't want to go to, even if there wasn't a pandemic, which there is.  So if I don't want to go to a show and I don't want to do mindless circles in the dust, what do I want to do?  Go on hacks PLAY LEGOS Get dressed up in jump tack Instead of doing arena exercises, what do I want to address today? What sparks my interest and engages my horse?  O HAI FANCY LADY HORSE All of a sudden, I have a willing partner going forward and I'm happy in the work too.  My low-key goals for the year are to take a couple of jump lessons and get ZB to a cross country facility to get exposed to ditches, banks, and water. New barn buddy Nadia is all on board for that, so hopefully there will be epic media when it happens.  R BEEBEH EVENT HORSE HA My other low key goal for the year is to dress ZB up for some over the top photo shoot with long flowing locks and I dunno, flowers in her mane or something. If the hair is giving you a twitch, well, get used to it because I love it.  I mean. Who isn't excited for fancy new ZB media? She's literally the world's cutest full size horse.... [Read more]